Are you happy Mommy? This was the innocent question that my 4 yr old daughter asked me this morning. The question that brought me to tears.
Now, to give the question context, I have to explain that she has asked me this question several times in the last few weeks. She asks me this question when I am stern with her, when I am cleaning up a mess she has made (nail polish on the wall, anyone?), or when I am frazzled and rushed. I have had to catch myself, and explain to her that although I may not be happy with her behavior, or the situation at the moment, yes, Mommy is happy.
But, am I happy? This has been a tough week. And today I don't feel very happy. Do I have many things to be happy about? Yes I do. I have a nice house, food to eat every day. I am healthy, everyone in my family is healthy. I have a husband who I love and who loves me. I count my blessings every day.
But the world's tragedies and others' sadness does affect me. And when other of life's frustrations and disappointments occur in my everyday life, sadness creeps in.
I want to be the best mother I can for my children. Times like this make it quite challenging. So today I make a pledge to myself to do everything I can to feel happier and project that to those around me. And for me today, that starts with a run. An all out, breathing hard, sweaty run.
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